Sisterly Advice

No amount of social network stalking will replace spending quality time catching up with your friends or family.  Take the time to put effort into the relationships that are meaningful to you, don't assume you know what's going on in someone's life because of what you see on the internet.

 

Be good to each other,

LB

A slippery slope…accidental and intentional sexting.

By Contributing Editor: Laurel Burke

Men are visual creatures. They once had an imagination, technology has made them greedy. 

In the 'olden days', when you missed someone or were thinking about them - you called them.  Heck! Before that you sent photos that had to get developed, or hand wrote a letter that you sprayed with your sexiest perfume.  Ok, I never did that (I’m not THAT old) but you get the point.

This is a cautionary tale.

“I’ve been sexting before it was even called sexting!” exclaimed my friend at dinner one night. Well I haven’t and don’t plan to, maybe I’m a prude but I prefer the real thing. I’ve never dated someone long distance before either, so this type of communication may just be a necessity?

I viewed sexting as a high school concern; the CW and MTV always seem to address it.  And now with all these clowns in the media and the rapid pace of technology…Tiger, Weiner, Favre can now practically sext in HD.  What idiots I thought, WHO does that?!

This cautionary tale doesn’t start off well...

I gave my number to someone in Miami *note* I'm on the other side of the country (I know, I know…FLAG). He seemed normal, claimed his mom loved him (FLAG). He warned me he liked sending pics (boy was he oblivious, FLAG). It started out with “normal” things like his balcony, and his family reunion in exchange for a photo of me from when we met, and a victory photo after I cliff jumped in Maui.  ALL PG. 

Then the bad stuff started…

Him in a suit that clearly didn’t fit (FLAG).  Then *BAM*…a pic of him with no shirt, Santa Claus boxers (FLAG- it was AUGUST!) and man jewelry (FLAG!!!!) in his bathroom.  

Wait what?! Did that just happen? This kind of narcissism is uncalled for! *BUT* Am I showing my friends at happy hour? YES. Am I changing my settings on my phone so you can’t preview a text? YES.  Geeze. Dude, have you not thought about the ramifications of sending me this? 

I didn’t respond for over two weeks and he STILL decided to send another pic showing almost EVERYTHING, thinking it would lure me to visit him.  Take a hint, my lack of response means I’d like to unsubscribe.  I thought about sending something random or disturbing back, but figured the weirdo might actually dig it.  So I ignored him and it stopped…fingers crossed.  Thank goodness I didn’t exchange my last name, but that’s another cautionary tale ;)

Important Lessons to Learn from This

1. You can’t just arbitrarily send a dirty text without establishing some sort of “tit for tat,” if you will.  If that hasn’t been established, consider it phone rape.  It’s not consensual! 
2. If you’re in a relationship or casually dating, be aware someone else might see your photo.  Even if you don’t include your face or all of your gender parts, be prepared in dealing with it if others see it or hear about it. Stuff gets out, technology is crazy like that.  You gotta take responsibility for your actions.
3. If you’re not into that stuff say so! Had I called the dude out, I wouldn’t have received any additional texts *note* That had time stamps during the work day (WHO DOES THAT?).  If a guy says he’s fantasizing about you, it’s normal, but tell him to make it happen then and say sexting isn’t your fancy.

NOW…I know. 

Sext with caution sisters!

{Image Courtesy of: Someecards}

Uh Fail.

I love your emails. Thinking it's time to teach a few classes for the guys?

"My Boyfriend just showed me some picture of this ugly girl, and said that he thinks I look like her"

Uh. Fail.

...if you have any good 'Fails' post FB or shoot me an email.

Perspective: For those going through a break-up...

{Something to remember when you question if you're doing the right thing. You are.}

{Your Questions} Surviving High School: Advice to Your Little Sister

Q: I'm leaving home soon and want to leave a card for my step sister with some "sisterly" advice in it. She's going to be about halfway through her junior when I leave, and I really want to give her some advice about enjoying high school and making the best of living at home, but I can't seem to find the right words.Do you think that you could help me out? I would REALLY appreciate it!

A: This is such a genius thing to do. You're a great sister and she's going to appreciate it so much...here's a little something I'd go with. Take what works best ♥

Cheers,
J
__________________________

Dear Little Sister,

High school shouldn't be the best days of your life (that's what college is for), but you should enjoy it for what it is - a rite of passage (and a source of hilarious stories for years to come). Aside from the football games and clique social circles, this is your time to learn what kind of person you want to be, or more importantly what kind of person you don't want to be. Whether you crave attention or anonymity, this is your moment to define who you are despite the judgements of others. And don't be concerned about "fitting in." By definition, fitting in makes you average and you shine far too brightly for that.

You'll only have this experience once, so take full advantage and enjoy all the cheesy moments high school has to offer (that means tons of Prom pictures!!). Truthfully no one loves high school, but know there's more out there for you and soon enough you'll find it.

Remember that one or two high school friends will actually be there for life; Make sure those are the ones you're surrounding yourself with.

Download a free copy of this 'Note'
to share with your Little Sis'

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